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Tuesday, July 18, 2023

A World Of Endless Noise




The first two lines came just as I was about to go to sleep but fell asleep as I sought after the next two lines. Woke up and was successful in my quest. Around 4am, once more wakened but could not return to my dreams. Might as well start my jog in the coolness of the darkness as I am sure the sun will be merciless in the day.  An extra stanza was added but took two solid days to polish the wording and imagery.

1 夜鳴鶯啼難入眠
Unable to sleep with the night song of a chirping mockingbird,
2 直至紅霞敲鐘前 Just before the moment when rosy clouds strike the temple bell.
3 寰宙漸漸甦醒覺 Stirring sounds of the cosmos and earth gradually felt,
4 流星依依殞落見 And yet reluctant falling stars still be seen.

5 郊野走獸飛禽地 The wilderness - a haven for roaming beasts and flying creatures,
6 城翫車馬遊龍天 City of heavy traffic in horse and buggy, like coiling dragons cruising in the sky.
7 豈求隔世歡招寧 How quietude from other realms be wonderfully sought?
8 何浴凡塵骸垢纒 And to wash off filthy entanglements of the body in the mundane world?

1 Other alternatives for 啼 were 叫 and 歌 but the choice made was I write it prettier with a brush and sounded more literary.

2 Implies the short duration of respite in silence before the noise of a different nature begins in line 3. In the original text, “temple” was not mentioned explicitly. It could also be the bell or drum tower to sound the morning audience with the emperor.

3 The original”大地” looked and sounded banal to me. 寰宙 suggests a grander scale of things. 

4 The original line, 銀河殘光依依見 conveys no movement. The new version also emphasizes the fleeting nature of silence as in the falling of a “star”.

5 The wilderness can still be a noisy place, filled with backland creatures noise.

6 Inspired by the 李煜’s 車如流水馬女如龍. 翫 is often used to mean artistic or cultural pursuit enjoyment while 玩 is a more general term for casual and straightforward term for enjoying activities such as playing games etc. Thus, 古翫 is the correct term used to mean “antique collecting” or “antiques” but is more cumbersome to write than 古玩. Nowadays, 翫 is considered as a variant of 玩.

7 歡招 came from the Thousand Classic’s 欣奏累遣, 慼謝歡招. 
Other characters influenced from the classic were 翫, 骸 and 垢.


8 Using another rhetorical question to answer the previous question is better in poetry than using a straightforward answer in my eyes. Creates more intrigue.

Sunday, July 16, 2023

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